Is terrorism affecting your child?

Terror: noun 1. Extreme fear. "People fled in terror" synonyms: extreme fear, dread, horror, fear and trembling, fright, trepidation, alarm, panic, shock

Terror; one of the many things we want to protect our children from, yet it appears to be all around us. We see news reports about bombs, school shootings, planes coming down, innocent people being killed, the most recent event only yesterday in Brussels... you can attempt to prevent them from seeing news programmes, reading headlines on newspapers or hearing conversations about whats going on, but they hear it in the playground, from peers, siblings and I think it's neither realistic nor wise to say you can completely hide it all. So how is terrorism affecting your child? What is the best way too deal with the issue? 

This is only my opinion, and you know your child better than anyone. But if questions start being asked, it is better to try and address them. If you don't, then your child's amazingly intricate imagination will start on a journey, and it may not be a particularly nice one.

Children may become frightened when you read them scary stories or when they watch movies, learn about ghosts and big hairy monsters, and you can easily smile and respond "but it's not real". We can't say this about terrorism.  As they encounter issues like these and learn more about the big wide world, their anxiety is often very real, and we can't tell them it's not real. It is very real.   

Answer any questions as honestly and openly as possible, taking into account your child's age and using appropriate language that they will be able to understand. Try to balance your emotional response, ie not showing too much of your own fear for them to pick up and run with, and not being so lighthearted that it diminishes their very real fear. Also, if possible, try to address questions during daylight hours. Everything seems scarier at night.

Yes it's happening, and it's horrible, but the things that have happened are not near us. We as adults know the threat of terror is real and can happen anywhere, but we need to make sure our children feel safe in their own home. Give them lots of reassurance that home is the safest place to be. Build resilience, empower them, continue to have fun and play and do the things they normally do at home; if they feel secure at home, the rest will follow. 

There are very bad people in the world, they can see this, but there are many more good people.

You may feel powerless against terrorism. But by simply continuing to live your life and doing the things you would normally do is the best thing to do. These people have no right to spoil your lives or your children's lives. Don't let them. Try to rise above it all and teach your children to do the same.

If you are worried about the effect that terrorism is having on you or your child, or if you or your child is experiencing any kind of anxiety, feel free to contact me. Talking to someone else may be helpful, and your child hearing reassurances from someone else can help instil the messages from you as a parent. 

Kathrine
www.newbalancecounselling.co.uk